Kid Free Moments

28 August 2015

headshot hollyconners parentstalk


Have you ever had one of those moments when you hear a song and suddenly you are transported back to a memory or feeling from the past? Music is such a powerful thing.

Recently my husband, a musician in his spare time, started playing ‘our’ song on guitar, not for any sentimental reason, but simply because it’s a great song we both love. I hadn’t heard it in at least a year, but suddenly I was remembering moments from years gone, feeling like I was 20 again and couldn’t help but smile.

With a new baby, a toddler and all the other ups and downs life throws in our way, it is little wonder we had not made much time for each other as a couple lately. Or since becoming parents really. A bit sad since our eldest is almost 3.

It can be so easy to get absorbed in the lives of our kids, making our every moment about them, only to put those other important relationships in our lives to the side. And it’s no one’s fault. We are both just as guilty.

On the journey to being the best parent you can possibly be, it can be all consuming at times.

Even on those rare kid free moments, as they sleep or when you take a once in a blue moon night out together while the grandparents babysit, you find most of your conversations end up being about your kids anyway.

Even when you are away from them, they are still in the forefront of your mind.

There may even be a little bit of that dreaded parent guilt because you decided to take a little time for yourselves as a couple, instead of making every moment of every day about your offspring.

But this shouldn’t be the case.

Our kids mean the world to us, but we also need to take time too. Our relationship with our partner is just as important as our relationship with our kids. After all, your kids will eventually move out (maybe).

Make that time to go out together, just the two of you, if you are able to. Even once a month is a good start.

Talk to each other every day and make sure the conversation is more than just your children’s latest milestones and what bills need to be paid. Even consider doing things as a family that were things you loved together back when it was just the two of you.

Cherish your relationship with your partner just as much as that you have with your children. It will be your partner beside you once the kids are all grown up and living their own lives, so make your relationship a priority!

Written by

Holly Conners

Holly has close to a decade of experience in the field of psychology, however these days is more focused on her passion of writing and life as an at home mum to two beautiful girls. You can find Holly blogging about all her journey towards a simplified life at Simplify Create Inspire, or her love of family travel at her travel blog, in between her creative love of all things crafty.

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